Christ is my Super Hero!

So the title is a little tacky but aren't super heroes here to protect you? Lord, is that not what you do? It doesn't matter what is going on, you are there, when I need You and even when I "don't." You come running, when I am scared, nervous, unsure, happy, joyful, etc. I love a God who has the power that You do.
Earlier today You and I chatted and I said I want a God who can discipline me when I sin. Such as, if I ever cheated on my wife, I would want you to take my ministry away, fire me from the church, make me earn that trust back. That is really scary; it's a thought that keeps me in check. Not because I want to run off and cheat but because You are such a big God! I mean BIG!!! You hold so much power in Your little finger and that alone makes me want to worship You! I want a God who cares enough about me that would take away one of the things I want/desire and value most. That is being a good parent, let alone a great God. I am no good without You. I get lost without You.

When I start to slip, when I want to sin, there You are, pulling me right back in, right back to You. Shoot, to steal a line from Sugarland's new song I want you to tell me that "we are stuck like glue." That would be a great thing! You make life worht living. You take the horrible things my life, the fights with my wife, the uncertainity of my decisions, my lust, my selfishness and every other sin and use them to build me up. You take the bad, turn it into good (Romans 8:28). You give me a life (John 10:10b). You make my heart beat, You knew me before I was born, Your hands created me. You take the sin in my life and use it to show me what I need to do to be like You. You give me chances to look like Your Son, to build character in me. Why would I want to leave You? You alone are worthy of worship!

Lord, I pray for James, the 9th grader I met today. It seems like You wanted to know if I was ready, even out of season. You had me home at the right time, You had him walking by with his lawnmower at the right time. You made sure I couldn't mow my lawn today, instead I washed the dogs. You gave me a chance to talk with the kid, invite him to church and youth group, to give me some extra money and our Starting Point card. I want to see something come out of this, to see him come to know You. I pray that he shows the card to his family, that he talks about his meeting me, that what You did through me, though it may seem little, you multiply and use to grow Your Kingdom!! Thank You for letting him live so far away so I could drive him and his mower home. Make something great come out of this.

Tomorrow is Adam's wedding. I love my best friend! I wish I was there and between You and I, I feel guilty for not being there. He is a good man and he always watched over me. He helped me grow up, was patient with me and helped me find my direction. I truly don't think he knows You though. He sees it more as a religion, not a relationship. He sees it more as going to church not as a lifetime/daily thing. His wife (as of tomorrow) is not a believer as well. Though her and I do not see eye to eye all the time, bring her to know You too. They both need You. They both, just as much as I do, need You. Lord, I know You love me, though I am not worthy. I beg You, I implore You, please, bring them into Your Kingdom. Break their hearts, melt that ice, open their eyes, etc. whatever it takes, help them see You and trust You.

Thank You my Old Friend, thank You for Your love, for freedom, for love!
AMEN

Irritations are what??

So Lord, I am irritated. Look, I think it is stupid to feel frustrated over little things. However, that anger, that irritation is real. It burns inside me, it's honest and here I am being honest with You about it. Though, what's the point with being upset? What does it gain? To be frustrated over something small, something out of my control, something that seems stupid, some rule or command just seems fruitless. I feel like it compares to a little man walking up to a redwood and yelling at it for growing so tall! God, being irritated and showing it (how easy I show my emotions) does not bring glory to You. How can I show someone Christ instead? Right now, I feel like I have some itch to argue, to go off, yell and scream, even to fight! God, what good is this for Your kingdom?? Is it not fruitless and sinful? Regardless what You're teaching me, I do not want to fail you. Give me some strength to fight through this and to please You through it. You want faithfulness not sacrifice. You want obedience through faith, then give me the faith I need to trust You so I can lay these irritations down at Your feet.

Father, I come before You too on behalf of my cousin Krislyn. She is hurting bad. They think they have the cancer beat but have to stick with Chemo for now. They do not want to have the cancer come back in a few years. She is hurting, dealing with so much pain and lately blisters and shingles. Lord, she needs you. Yes of course I want to ask You to take it all away, but Lord, You have plans for her. Strengthen her mind, body, immune system and faith. Be with her mom Kristina, for she is sacrificing so much for her family and to get Krislyn through all this. Love on them, keep them close to You and to each other. Help them have the financial support they need for all the bills and traveling costs. Lord I will trust You and I love You!! I thank You for watching over our family and all the love and comfort You bring is. Thank You for being my God and for all Your power and majesty. Thank You for being my King and allowing me a part into Your kingdom!
Amen

My Story

I want my story to be filled with praise to You. I want to end this life with an impact. I want to make that impact for you. I want to touch lives, but to touch them for Your kingdom. A Kingdom of God that is made complete in the hearts of men. I want to be apart of someone elses story, the part that has their life being changed by Your words coming out of my lips, out of my life. I want to bring them that living bread, that living water their soul needs.

I can say that I am not worthy, nor deserving, and it's true. However, it must be like the excuse everyone gives You. Instead let the words come out of my mouth be one that moves me and pleases You. I feel like I have a tough road ahead of me. I feel I have lost a step or two when it comes to my boldness. Why? You are a God who does not deserve that! You are a mighty God. My life is full of stories, monuments even, that testify how great You are.

Father, I love You. Forgive me for my sin of idol worship. Forgive me for turning my heart away from You. Forgive me for choosing my pride over You. Forgive for the days and weeks when I do not turn my eyes Your way. You are a holy God, a righteous God, a God who has compassion on me, how could I ever turn from You?

Father, stregthen my wife and I right now as we fight through our deepest desire. You know we want a child, we yearn for one. The deepest anquish we have right now is not having one, but You are a great God. With or without a baby, we trust You. We will follow You, and maybe this is a test of just that. I do not want to be bold as Peter and claim no matter what we will follow You, but I see how You broke Peter and then what You did in His life. Break me if You must, as scary as that can be, break me. If there is a reason why we can't have a child, may it be on my shoulders. I cannot fathom the pain it would cause my wife. I do not want to see her hurt so bad, instead let it be because of me, may I shield my wife, the love of my life.

Thank You for the opening of the church! I am excited Lord to see Starting Point come to life this weekend! No more preview services, this is it, the Pro's so to speak! May we impact the city of Raleigh for Your Kingdom. Bring the people who are hurting, weak and weary, who need You and give us the strength and joy to love on them all for Your sake!!
Amen